The Elevator Family Goes Abroad
London calling at Christmastime! A display window at Harrods Department Store! A red telephone booth! The London Eye! All those small, cozy places for the Wilsons to stay in! But after some royal heroics at the Tower of London, they end up spending Christmas Eve in a guardhouse outside Buckingham Palace. Buy
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Twas & Tis
Twas & Tis, Anta's Helper Trolls
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Straight
Straight
Our teacher tells us to,
Sit up straight,
Form a straight line at the door,
Keep our handwriting straight.
Use a straight edge to draw straight angles.
Our teacher also says,
“Straighten up, or you’ll go straight to the office.”
Anta Claus of Antarctica
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Oic

If I finally get it,
When I figure it out,
“Oh, I see,” I could cry,
Instead Oic I shout.
Anta Claus Short Story
Anta Claus of Antarctica


“Oh! Oh! Oh!” Anta said. “The list is too long this year. Too many new names; too many repeats. Great bother this.”
In the back of the workshop Anta Claus’s two ten-foot troll helpers, Tis and Twas, prepared for Anta’s journey.
“You better pack my extra-large sack,” Anta called out.
“Will do, Anta,” said Tis. “We’ll shovel in an extra load of coal.”
“Along with plenty of rotten potatoes, rusty bolts, and a few surprises,” said Twas.
Anta rolled up his list and rose from his chair. In the hallway, he dressed for his long journey ahead. On a row of hooks by the front door hung his sleigh-riding outfit. First, he pulled on a pair of black trousers and tightened the white belt around his narrow waist. Next, he put on his black jacket with a furry white fringe. A pair of white rubber boots went on his feet and a pointy black hat with a cotton ball on the tip went on his head.
“Great bother this,” he said. “Too many misbehaving children around the world. From Tahiti to Tasmania, Ecuador to England. Boys and girls are naughty everywhere.”
His outfit complete, Anta Claus grabbed his loaded black sack and left the cottage. He trudged down a path to the small barn. Inside Anta’s eight large yaks stood in their tidy stalls, swishing their short tails.
“Evening, lads,” Anta said. “Another year, and another journey to the four corners of the world.”
The yaks were magnificent beasts. Each boasted a fine pair of long curved horns. Each one had long, shaggy wool hanging from their bellies. What is more, each yak’s fur was a different collar. Anta Claus hitched the yaks to his sleigh in pair. Closest to the sleigh went Yellowback Yak and Orangeback Yak. Next came Redback Yak and Purpleback Yak. Before them, Anta hitched Blueback Yak and Greenback Yak, and in the lead he put Whiteback Yak and Blackback Yak.
He tossed his black sack in the back seat of the sleigh. He climbed into the front and grabbed the reins.
“Get on Whiteback Yak! Get on Blackback Yak!” he shouted. “Get on the rest of you lads.”
In graceful unison, the colorful beasts leaps toward the pale-blue sky. Over the barn, over the cottage, away from the South Pole they flew. Then from the black sleigh, now high up in the air, came a shout.
“Oh! Oh! Oh! Be wary of Christmas, naughty children! Oh! Oh! Ohhh!”
Noe School
A financial crisis! Cut costs! With dough running low and programs costing too much at his school, Principal Ouia insists that his staff and pupils must stop using that most popular non-consonant that follows d and is prior to f. That common writing symbol was also cut from this book!
Lipogram (from Ancient Greek: λειπογράμματος, "leaving out a letter") a kind of writing in which a particular letter or group of letters is avoided—usually a common vowel, and frequently "E", the most common letter in the English language.
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Happy Birthday on Mars
Mistletoe
Anta Claus of Antarctica
ANTA CLAUS ANTARCTICA
In a small cozy cottage on the cold South Pole lives a tall, skinny man with a bushy, black beard. His name is Anta Claus. Last Christmas Eve, Anta Claus sat before a crackling fireplace inside his workshop. He held a long list of names on a curling sheet of paper. A single word on top read:
NAUGHTY
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The Arctic Ark
The Arctic Ark - a global warming allegory
Global warming has wreaked havoc upon Santa Claus's home on the North Pole. The toy factory roof leaks. The reindeer barn is flooded, and the snow is too slushy for safe sleigh take-offs. In order to be ready for Christmas Eve, Santa has no choice. He must move away from the North Pole. His helpers will build a ship, the Arctic Ark, and from there Captain Claus can prepare for Christmas. A-ho-ho-hoy!
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